Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Hey guys!Very sorry that I didnt update my blog for so long..Been quite busy, so forgive me, kaes?Lol.So anywae, last week was quite a rush..On thurs, 307 went to botanic garden..Yays!We had lots of fun, but it was quite tiring , cos I kept getting chased..Apparently, I have a 'fan' club..Hilarious, rite?Yar, but my classmates are so fun and cute..Actually, I even got two proposals on that day, one by Shiyao and the other by Yvette..They are just so fun..307 imba!Then, I had a camp during the weekends at Pulau Ubin..It was called Survival Training camp cos it actually teaches us all the survival skills needed during a expedition etc.It was fun, especially with my group, Group 2..The ppl there are fun to be with and they even care for everyone..Sweet rite?I really enjoyed the camp, except for the campfire on the last nite..The sec 2s werent enthusiastic at all..Which somewhat ruined the atmosphere during the campfire..But then again, it wasnt so bad for 1st timers..Good job campfire ICs!!Anw, to my dear grp 2 members;Love ya guys!!XDThe day that we were to head back to mainland,I was emo-ing..For some reason that I couldnt figure out at that moment..Maybe I was tired..Or maybe I was upset that someone was hostile to me..Or maybe I was upset that the sec2s werent showing respect to the sec3s enouugh..Sigh..I just cant say for sure..So that was the end of the camp at Pulau Ubin..But that nite, or the nite after, I had dream, which I hav mixed feelings abt..That dream actually portrayed me as a somewhat life saver..Daring to take risks to save ppl kidnapped and placed at a building , planted with a bomb..That building just so happens to be my HDB block..And I didnt realise that my family was still in the building, until after the bomb exploded..Miraculously, I survived the bomb explosion and then went to my unit..I went in and realized that it was glowing with a different shine..Then I saw my mum..At that moment, I juz Knew that she was dead, even though she was standing up..She just had that glow to her too..She was slim and looked like she was in her younger days.. She looked and was very happy..And I was happy for her..I just felt that she was going somewhere happy, eventhough she said nothing..It was as it we communicated thru facial expressions..That particular dream made me realise something..That we would never know when we were going to die..I mean you could just drop dead in the middle of the road if it was time for you to go..You could lose your loved ones suddenly too..That dream also got me thinking..Wad would my reaction be if I suddenly lose a loved one?Would I be able to cope with it?Probably yes, if I had treasured them before they left..But a definite no if I didnt..That nite, I cried myself to sleep..Maybe I knew this fact along time ago, only that I didnt realise it..Maybe that was the reason why I kept on telling my loved ones that I love them..By words or actions..So just in case ppl still dont noe that I love them, here it is again..For whoever who knows me..For whoever whom I hav poured my feelings to..For whoever who has poured their feelings to me..For whoever who cares for me..For whoever whom I care for..For whoever whom I respect..I love you guys and pls forgive me if I had done any wrong..I may have acted on my anger or frustration..I may have gone too far in a joke..But pls, pls rmb..And dun forget..That I love you guys and you mean everything to me..I will end my entry here..
So, bye guys!!
your name @ 8:06 PM | your comment link
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
I'm pissed. Very pissed.But the thing is, I have no idea why.Or rather, I had no idea why..Come to think of it, i realised..No. 1 was because of the scholars in sch..They are more racist than any of us Singaporeans..Took me by surprise..Can't they understand that Singapore really needs the peace?They are being educated in Singapore..Cant they at least respect our practices as a nation?Really, it was bad enough 44yrs ago..I dont think anyone would like another riot in Singapore..No. 2 was my classmates..I think they were borned to suan ppl or sumting..They, or rather HE had to suan me for not getting into excos..As if knowing it and learning to accept it wasnt bad enough..sigh..Pls, why do ppl not spare a thought for me?(referring to SOME ppl in 307..)Need you rub salt into my wound?My wound is already almost totally healed..And you have to open it again..Really, that is not helping me much..Just do me a favour by being considerate, kay?No. 3 was the listening comprehension 'O' level examinations..What in the world were those ppl thinking when they arranged for ML & TL to be at 5pm?What? We are not human enough?Or lack of manpower?I dont think so..My invigilator was a malay..I'm sure the chinese students had chinese invigilators..So what was the problem?Seriously..Think of the minority too, can you?So I guess I might as well proceed on to explain why I flare up everytime ppl criticize other races..See, I believe that ppl should respect others..What have others done to deserve your criticism..Fine. If you think that particular person deserves it, go on and critisize..That does not mean that you have to critisize the whole race, rite?What makes you think that ppl who have the same skin colour all reacts the same way?We have our own brains too, you know..In case you didnt know, we have the ability to think too..So what gives you the right to look down on ppl?Does critisizing make you superior?I dont think so..My mum actually says,"They critisize so that they dont feel inferior, when in fact they are.. And they realise that in their mind. That is why they critisize.."Somehow, I partly agree with her..But another part of me realises that it may be because they dont place themselves in other shoes..That brings me to my point..Everyone, or rather, everything deserves respect..If you dont show respect to others,do you deserve they respect that they show you?Think about it..
your name @ 5:57 AM | your comment link
Sunday, July 13, 2008
Friday:Cross country run at Bishan Park.Arnd 6.30pm. Race over. Everyone dismissed.I stood at one side. Scanning for ppl to go home with.Spotted Ms Kuck. She walked towards me,Talked to me abt Exco. "I've got something to tell you. I'm sorry, but you didnt make it for the elections.."That was it. I somehow came to know that I didnt make it. But it just needed somebody to tell me that.Mixed feelings. Still felt alright. Thought that the others still didnt know.Didnt really show what I was feeling. didnt want anybody to worry.Even then, I still needed to talk to someone.Saturday:The news was starting to sink in when Jasper talked to me abt the elections during tuition.My mixed feelings started to sort out, though still confused..Tuition ended early, so I decided to call ppl up to talk..Thanks Jasper, for taking the time to talk to me and the advice given!Claire was the 1st to pick up my call..Asked her a few questions and found out that the others found out already..Before I did.. Even before the cross country run..Tears welled up, cried with Claire still on the other end..Sniffs turned to sobs to river of tears from my eyes to my mattress.. Lols..I wasnt really sure what my feeling was, but I somewhat rmb that I felt hurt..Maybe I kind of expected Oreo to attempt to tell me..I would have appreciated that..Anw, we hung up when I had to run an errand..Thanks Claire for answering my questions! Next was Mel, right aft the previous connversation ended..She was with her relatives, so she was quite busy..Still returned my call, bless her..Yar, I was still rather hurt, and I told her..She was sweet too, still at the end of the line when neither of us had nothing to say..She apologised profusely, even though it wasnt her fault..Our conversation was quite brief, considering that I had to run some errands aft that..Thanks Mel, for returning my call though you were busy! XDI called Dom..Had a few questions posed for him..Then my irritating emotions had to build up AGAIN..I had quite a lot to say, but it kept getting stuck in my throat, blocked by the tears..But Dom was still there too, hearing me sobbing..Thanx Dom!Soon aft that, I had a super long talk with Elgin..Thanx Elgin!All in all, I spent up to 3hours talking to ppl..My mum saw me during intervals and kept asking me why I was crying(due to my swollen eyes, i guess)..But I guess she understood that I needed to talk to my friends, so that I get over it faster..So here's my list of ppl whom I owe thanks to:-JasperClarindaMelissaDominicElginBelverlinCharmainePeiyingMy mumAnd those who I didnt mention and those who worried abt me(Sorry! My memory is failing me!)Thanx guys for picking up my calls and listening to as well as consoling me when i really REALLY needed you guys..Thanx for the advice given as well..Thanx for the care you guys have for me!Just wanna tell you guys;I may not get over it so soon, I just need time, kay?"Time heal all wounds.."Dun worry about me so much, cos my passion for SLB is still burning..You can be sure that I WILL be there!Love you guys! XD
your name @ 8:20 AM | your comment link
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Passing Out Parade:The Sec4s are marching pass the flags..My heart is beating very fast..Not because I thought that we Sec3s couldnt do the 'Akan Mara' command..That I trust that we can do it..My heart was racing for what finally dawned on me..The 42nd batch of NCOs are taking over, and it's US..Throughout that 14 steps of marching forward, I was very nervous and scared of what was to come..The responsibilities, the teamwork & unity needed..A goal for our unit..I personally have a goal for our unit..Kind of similar to oreo's vision..But instead of 'heal the board', it's 'heal the unit' this time..I really think that I am a changed person..I love SLB, yet I dislike it..I love NPCC, yet I dislike it too..Maybe all the things that helped me..And all the things that made me a better person..I'll have to thank NPCC as well as SLB..Two very different yet very similar commitments..It's truly amazing how much you can reflect once you make it a habit..Last time, I did reflect..But all the reflected stuffs could not be developed just like that..That was why I got myself a blog, I guess..So that I improve myself, & that my ideas and reflections get developed faster than it used to..Also because I wanted to have a broader perspective and link things & topics..Like in my previous entry:I drew the link of others inability to understand why ppl do things..This is what I believe in;Everything happens for a reason..For example, you cant just judge someone by appearance or behaviour..That would be just on the surface..You must consider factors like upbringing, family background, past experiences and such..Cos these really are the factors that affect how a person becomes..In terms of behaviour, character, ability to make friends, decisions or even how ppl react to different situations..But how do we know, you may ask..I mean, we are absolutely NOT mind readers, right?Yup, you are right..We aren't..But that can't possibly stop us from TRYING to understand, right?At least just think of possibilities on why a person might be doing that..You can ask too, for a reason..But sometimes a person might not say what or how he/she truly feels..Cos that IS one human nature..Just rmb, everytime you are angry at somebody..Place yourself in that person's shoes(not literally)..And try to understand by considering factors that might affect that person..It may not be accurate the few times you do that& you may find it very troublesome..But you will get the hang of it & it helps..A lot..Gotta go now..Liyana signing off now..
your name @ 5:10 AM | your comment link
